About Blimmin' Time...
by jaffacake1
Summary: Ron and Hermione both go kinda crazy. Hormones are hitting etc, and they're *finally* getting a clue. Well, kinda.


I don't have a title yet.  Help me with one, please people!  
  
A/N 1: This is my 1st ever fanfic, and while my friends tell me it's good, they're very nice, and might not tell me if it was ****.  And I think the grammar's gone wrong, and it doesn't make much sense.  Oh well.  And I'm sorry if some of it seems a bit repetitive.  
  
A/N 2: In spite of some derogatory remarks I might make about redheads, I don't mean them.  In fact, I want to be a redhead.  My hair's kinda red I suppose, but not red enough.  Ditto with freckles.  And anyone else I might insult with their thoughts, I'm not thinking them, they are.  
  
A/N 3: I dunno if people think they sound too americanised or whatever, but I'm from England, and I speak like this.  And do you have *any* idea how hard it was to stop Hermione swearing???  It's much easier with Ron.  He, thank God, does swear.  So I'm taking out my frustration in his mind.  
  
A/N 4: I'm very sorry for writing so many authors notes.  I'm just anxious, and I love writing.  I'm getting treatment.  I *will* learn when to shut up.  Like, now would be a good idea?  Uh-huh.  
  
Dedicated to my beta readers Haz, Min, and Poppy.  Thank you so much!  ::bows:: I'd like to thank my family, my entourage, my yes people, my… Oh, special thanks to Haz who typed it all up.  
  
P/N (publishers note) well I typed most of this bloody thing up, so I hope you enjoy it! Plus, fantasy fights guidelines state that my website has to be family friendly so I had to replace the stronger swearwords with stars, I'm sorry Kat, please don't hit me… Anyway, this story is so cool, read it! PS Kat didn't add in that, these characters don't belong to her or me, they belong to J K Rowling and no copy write infringement is intended.  
  
Part I  
  
He's at it again.  I can feel his eyes on the back of my neck.  Is he doing it on purpose?  Does he find it funny to drive me half crazy like this?  I'm *trying* to concentrate on what Professor McGonagall is saying about personal transfiguration.  Doesn't he realise how dangerous it could be if I don't know what I'm doing?  I could turn myself into half alarm clock, half toaster, or something disastrous.  I'm sure Professor McGonagall could sort it out, but it would be *so* embarrassing!  
  
How is it that he can do this to me? I mean, I could understand him having this affect on me if, for some bizarre reason, I found him attractive.  But, and this is where my theory goes wrong, I don't! I absolutely do not.  I mean, red hair and freckles? Not cute at all.  Not at all I tell you!  And his nose is so long.  And his eyelashes. ::sigh::  
  
Wait.  What did I just think? 'And his eyelashes'??  What on earth is wrong with me?  Nothing.  Nothing is wrong with me.  I'm calm and in control, and I am *not* thinking about Ron's eyelashes.  
  
"Miss Granger?"  
  
Oh no!  someone's talking to me!  Who could it be?  
  
"Miss Granger?"  
  
The voice seems annoyed.  Who is… oh… yes.  I'm in a Transfiguration lesson. It will be the professor.  It's perfectly normal for professors to ask their students questions.  So answer it!  
  
"Yes professor?"  
  
  
  
"Can you tell me please, Miss Granger, now that you have decided to rejoin our lesson, what the most important thing to remember is when trying to transfigure yourself?"  
  
"Erm…"  
  
I know this.  I've read all about it.  Why can I not think of it now?  
  
"I don't know, professor."  
  
I can't believe that I just said that.  It was so humiliating.  Ron is looking at me as though I just announced that I was going to live in the Forbidden Forest.  Doesn't he realise that this is all his fault?  Honestly, I plan to give him a right earful about this when the lesson is over.  
  
*       *       *       *       *  
  
I'm at it again.  Why do my eyes insist on wandering to the back of her head?  To that little spot where her hair is too short to go into a bun and springs out in this fascinating way?  No, not fascinating, *annoying*.  Remember that Ron.  Her hair is not fascinating.  It does *not* look magical when the sun catches it.  If anything, it's much too bushy.  Yes, that's it: too bushy.  If her hairs too bushy, then it mars her beauty, and that means that…   
  
Wait!  Halt!  STOP!!  Her beauty???  Since when have I thought she has beauty?  Well, I suppose everyone is beautiful and all that ****, but did I mean that?  Course I did.  She's not beautiful.  Her teeth stick out.  Or at least they used to…  BUGGER!!  
  
The hair.  Remember the TOO BUSHY hair, that is not at *all* fascinating.  Whatsoever.  You'd better remember that boy, or else I'll…  
  
"Miss Granger."  
  
Someone said her name!  Or was that just in my head?  No, why would it be in my head?  Someone's talking to her of course, you dolt.  
  
"Miss Granger."  
  
They sounded annoyed that time.  How dare they be annoyed at my 'Mione?  
  
'My 'Mione'??  Aaarrrggghhh!  I think I'm delirious.  In fact, I'm positive that my forehead feels too hot.  Yeah, that's it, I'm ill.  That's the only explanation for these crazy thoughts.  Perhaps I ought to go see Madam Pomfrey?  She'll make me better.  
  
Uh-oh.  Harry's looking at me oddly.  
  
"Ron?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Are you okay?"  
  
"Of course I'm okay.  Why wouldn't I be?"  Why does my voice sound so high?  
  
"You've gone bright red."  
  
Bright red?  Oh no!  Bloody blushing.  I swear, I must have *the* most blush worthy face in Britain.  And I bet I don't look as cute as 'Mione when I do it either.  She just gets these lovely rosy cheeks, but, well, my ears go purple and…  
  
That's it!  I'm going to the hospital wing.  Then I won't have to think that 'Mione's blushing is cute.  Cute?  Since when do I use that word??  And 'Mione?  Have I ever called her that before?  No.  And I don't intend to start it now.  I'm going to put up my hand.  
  
"Professor McGonagall?"  
  
"Yes Mr Weasley?"  
  
"Please may I go to the hospital wing?"  
  
"What seems to be the matter?"  
  
"I feel too hot." And I think I'm going crazy.  
  
"Well open a window then."  
  
Cold hearted b***h. There must be a rule against teachers treating students this way. I could research into it. With Hermione. And Harry, of course. No telling what I'll say without Harry there!!  
  
Part II  
  
He feels ill! Oh no! I hope he's alright. I don't want anything to happen to him, he *is* one of my best friends after all. Why would I want him hurt?  
  
I'm going to turn around. Nothing too scary, I'm just going to ask him if he feels ok. Nothing can go wrong if I just say that. 'Nothing can go wrong'? Talk about jinxing yourself. But, I will be brave. "A-are you ok?" He's gone bright red. Oh no! He looks very ill. I've read about illnesses like this. There was one particularly horrible one where… but I'm sure he hasn't got that.  It's probably just a fever. Why isn't he answering?  
  
"Ron?"  
  
He blinks and looks startled. Goodness, maybe he is really ill!  
  
"Yeah, 'Mione?"  
  
'Mione? He has a nickname for me! I've never heard that before! But that doesn't matter, 'cause he's one of my friends and friends often have nicknames for one another. It's perfectly normal and friendly.  
  
"Erm…" My face is growing hot! Aaarrrgghh!  
  
"Are you ok?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine"  
  
He's staring at the table. Why is he staring at the table? What is so fascinating there, hrm?  
  
Wait, he's raising his head. He's looking into my eyes. Put your eyes back on the table! Please Ron! Don't look into my eyes! I would like to breath again sometime soon.  
  
He's not looking away. I guess I'll have to do it. I can drag my eyes away from his. I can! My feet are interesting. I'll look at them. You can do it 'Mione! (Aaawww… his name for me! Wait, shush, bad HERmione. Shush!)  
  
Done it!  
  
"Good"  
  
Now turn around. Mission accomplished!  
  
I don't know how to say this, but I think I might… God, how embarrassing… I might like Ron! I mean, I've always liked Ron (Well, most of the time) but I think I *like him* like him. Aaaarrrgghh! What to do? What to do?  
  
* * * * *  
  
Eyes off her neck. Look at the table. The table is far more fascinating than tufts of her hair. My eyes are flicking up again. Stop it eyes! I'll curse you, I swear! She's turning around! Help! Table. Concentrate on the table.  
  
"A-are you ok?"  
  
She has a stammer! That's just so adorable! Adorable??? What is wrong with my vocabulary today?? And my face is feeling hot again. Have I *no* self- control?  
  
"Ron?"  
  
She said my name again! She really says it in a lovely way, no drawling, just a short, sharp 'Ron'. I wonder if she can roll her R's? 'Rrron!' She's looking at me strangely. Can she read my thoughts? Oh! I'm supposed to answer her!  
  
"Yeah 'Mione?"  
  
Fool! She doesn't know I call her that. She's going to think that I've gone crazy and she'll never talk to me again and…  
  
Look at the table!  
  
"Erm… are you ok?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine."  
  
I never noticed how boring tables could be before. Why can't they be bloody interesting? It would make my life so much easier.  
  
Hell, I can't do it. I'm going to raise my head.  
  
Her eyes! They're hazel! Exactly the same colour as the table. How could I ever think of the table as boring? My jaw's getting slack. I must look completely gormless. I really should look away now. But I don't want to!  
  
*She's* looking away! Does she really hate the sight of me that much?  
  
"Good"  
  
What? Oh, good I'm ok. Well I suppose that's better than 'I wish you were out of my sight'. She's turning around now. Damn.  
  
I think… no, I'm just being silly…  
  
But…what if…? Oh, hell, here goes. I think I might (*might*, mind you) like 'Mione. Well, *like her* like her. There! I can't believe I just thought that! Aaaarrgghh! What to do? What to do?  
  
Part III  
  
5… 4… 3… 2… 1  
  
BBBBRRRIIINNNGGGG!!!  
  
The bell just rang! I can speak to him now!  
  
Hold it… do I want to speak to him? I mean, what if I say something stupid? What if I accidentally give it away? He'll laugh and he'll point, then he'll tell everyone else and they'll laugh and they'll point, and I'll be laughed and pointed out of school!  
  
Gggggrrrrrr… this is all his fault. I *am* going to give him a piece of my mind! He'll think twice about messing with me again!  
  
* * * * *  
  
Kay, now that I've established that I (might) like Hermione, what am I going to do about it (hypothetically of course)? Not for the rest of my life, I'm only 15!! At the end of the lesson I mean. Do I run? Or do I stay and talk? If I run, she'll think I've gone crazy or something. If I stay, I'll have to think of something intelligent to say. Or even something stupid to say! I can't just stand there blushing and staring, can I? Run, stay? Run, stay? Maybe I should toss a coin…?  
  
BBBBRRRIIINNNGGGG!!!  
  
Bugger! No! The bell rang! I haven't decided yet! Help! Ooooh! I know, I could just walk out of the classroom, normally, without speaking to her. It can't fail!  
  
Gather up your things. Don't make a fuss. More *slowly* towards the door…  
  
She's seen me! She's coming towards me! Work legs, work damn you! I can run quicker than her. Oh no, she looks angry!  
  
What have I done now?  
  
* * * * *  
  
I don't know what's going on between those two today. Maybe they had one of their infamous 'I won't mention it if you don't' rows. I hate it when that happens, 'cause they act all polite and formal and *nice* to each other. It's kinda creepy.  
  
It seems different today. They're not being formal, so much as shy. I don't think this has ever happened before. And they both kept blushing matching shades of pink. *And* when I asked Ron if he was okay, he practically squeaked out his answer. It's all very strange.  
  
BBBBRRRIIINNNGGGG!!!  
  
Finally! Now maybe I can ask Ron what the hell's happening.  
  
"Ron?"  
  
He's not listening. He's panicking. What is wrong with that boy?  
  
Maybe if I drag him away…  
  
Oh... Kay? He's now frozen like a deer caught in headlights. What's bothering him…?  
  
Ah. Hermione. She's marching towards him, looking angry. This can't be good.  
  
"Just *what* do you think you were doing?" Uh-oh, she's hissing.  
  
"I - I - erm - I… What?" He's blushing. Again.  
  
"Are you trying to distract me?" What? This isn't making any sense. I assume Ron knows what it's about.  
  
"I - I – I was… hrm…" So I was wrong. He doesn't. Purple is an unbecoming colour on his face.  
  
"Answer me!"  
  
"I was – I was distracting you?"  
  
"Would I be asking otherwise?"  
  
"I don't know?" He looks really embarrassed now. Maybe I should go and separate them. She's advancing now.  
  
"You… Don't… Know?" I pity Ron, I really do. He looks a strange green colour. Can anyone else get these colours on their face or is it just him? Ron and his amazing technicoloured Dream Face?  
  
Why isn't he answering back? Any other day, this would have been a blazing row.  
  
I'm going to step in now.  
  
"Hey, who's hungry?" Could I be any more cheesy? It distracted them though, which is a *good* thing.  
  
"Hungry?" Ron ventures. He looks very grateful.  
  
"Yeah, you know, feel like food?" Is he brain-dead this morning?  
  
"Yeah! C'mon Harry" He's back!  
  
"How about you Hermione?" It's not like she can *literally* bite my head off, can she?  
  
"Yeah, yeah, of course." Why does she look bemused?? I *definitely* missed something here.  
  
This reminds me of something slightly, all this blushing and stammering and slack jaws. It reminds me a bit of the Christmas holidays last year, when we were trying to ask people to the Yule Ball, and Ron…  
  
No! It can't be, can it? Ron can't… He doesn't…He doesn't *like* like Hermione does he???  
  
Part IV  
  
I don't like this. I'm losing my mind. I went all tongue-tied. Still can't believe it. Tongue-tied. What a fool.  
  
She came up to me and started asking all these questions and all I could do was stand and stare. I *knew* I should've run. Thank God Harry distracted her before I said something even more stupid.  
  
We're walking down to dinner now. Strange looks all round. Harry looks half shell-shocked, half sick to his stomach. Hermione just looks bemused.  
  
I'm extremely confused. So I'm going to talk to you about it. You're my mind, you have to listen.  
  
Ok, so… why do I like Hermione? Yes, I've decided I like her now. It was either that, or I was going crazy. Guess which I prefer? Anyway… is it for her looks? Her mind? Her personality? Her ability to annoy the hell out of me without even trying?  
  
I'll go through this like she would: systematically.  
  
So… reason 1: Her looks. Well, I suppose she is kinda pretty really. Her hair isn't so much bushy, really, as curly in a triangular way. It kind of sticks out at a 45 degree angle (yes, I do know angles. I'm not stupid. I learnt it at home, okay?), and is crinkly… And bushy is such a harsh word. I prefer: angularly challenged. Well, it sounds smart, doesn't it? And it looks very nice straight. Or tied up. Or just about anyway in fact. Her teeth, well, they used to be a bit off putting, but now they're perfectly straight. Her face, is kind of hard to describe. It's a very studious face. You can tell there's a lot of thinking going on up there. And her eyes seem to shine out of her face, and her mouth, when she's angry, goes into this little pout, her lower lip sticks out and makes me wanna… Whoa! *Definitely* time for reason 2.  
  
Her mind. She's very clever you know. Never known anyone to read so many books. She's always top of our year too. She can be a right know-it-all when she wants to be. Not that that's a bad thing. Really. I mean it! Not only is it handy when you don't understand your potions homework, some of the things she tells us are really interesting. Not that I'd ever tell her that though.  
  
Reason 3: her personality. Well, her mind's part of it. I've already done that. She's very loyal. She's the kind who'll stick with you through thick and thin, so long as you don't accuse her of anything stupid. But I'd never do that. Ahem. She can be quite funny sometimes. I'd probably find her more funny if most of her humour wasn't wasted on taking the p*** out of me. She's also very nurturing. She'll make a great mother one day. Not that I'm planning… well…you know… I'm still only 15, for crying out loud! But it's very nice the way she fusses over you if you're hurt, and hugs you at the end of term and stuff.  
  
Reason 4: well, I was kind of kidding with this one. But if I were Hermione, I still wouldn't let it slide. So… well… she's very good at it. She's *always* bloody right, and that makes it *very* difficult to have an argument with her. You just know that your going to loose. Which makes you even more mad. And it's just a vicious circle that ends in a fight. They're actually quite invigorating. I like a good fight. I live in a house full of redheads. What do you expect?  
  
Hrm…, which one is it? Perhaps all four.  
  
I really should speak to her about it. I will. I'll try to catch her after dinner in the library.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Well, that went exceptionally badly. I just went up to him and screamed my head off. He looked like he really wanted to do a runner. He went beetroot red, his eyes widened, and I don't think he answered a single one of my questions. I am *so* glad that Harry got between us. I don't know what I'd've said if he hadn't. I could have given it all away.  
  
We're walking down to dinner now. Harry's giving me a disgusted look. I don't think I want to know why. Ron looks kind of confused, but he also looks as if he's deep in his thoughts, trying to solve a puzzle.  
  
I probably look bemused. I don't really know why I'm acting like this. He's quite good looking, I suppose. Yes, I know I said he wasn't earlier, but come to think of it, he could definitely be *much* worse. High praise, I know.  
  
His hair is a really bright eye-catching red now. It's not really curly, but it's not quite straight. It's got tufts all over. It's about all I can do not to try and flatten them down. Beat him over the head with 'Hogwarts, A History'?  
  
It could work. But I'd never really do it. I like that book.  
  
Hehehe. I'm just joking. You know that right? Good.  
  
His eyes are a startling blue colour. They jump out of his face and steal your vocal chords if your not careful. You don't want him *really* angry with you though. They stop sparkling then, and look icily cold.  
  
He's still very tall and lanky. He doesn't look so out of place now though. He's grown into himself now. He's very funny sometimes. I know I shouldn't laugh at half the things he says. 'There's going to be fog tonight!' Now that was a classic. Plus it's divination. I can laugh at that.  
  
He's clever too, when he puts his mind to it. He'd have to be to be that good at chess. And when he was helping with Buckbeak's case, he was very good. He found so many facts. If the ministry had listened to the speech he prepared for Hagrid I'm sure that Buckbeak would have gotten off straight away. He's extremely loyal as well. You know, he once through up slugs for over an hour because Malfoy insulted me. He called me a 'Mudblood', and Ron pulled out his wand to curse him. It would have been very effective if his wand were working. It was still very sweet though.  
  
I guess he's not so bad, really. He's quite nice when you think about it.  
  
::sigh::  
  
* * * * *  
  
I can't believe it! That's just weird. Ron and Hermione? They're always arguing.  
  
Wait. What have they argued about recently? Krum, for one. Ron's always bringing him up. He seems really bitter. Fleur as well. Hermione *really* doesn't like her. Could they be related? I can't believe I never saw this before! They are so obvious!  
  
I *suppose* they would be quite good together. Ron could be the crazy one, and Hermione could be the calm one. Maybe they could rub off on each other? Not literally! Oh… I have *nasty* pictures in my head now!  
  
I mean, maybe Ron'll become more responsible.  And Hermione could become less work obsessed.  
  
Well, it *could* happen, couldn't it?  
  
Part V  
  
I can do this. I *can* do this and I will. Hermione is a good friend of mine, and she won't think it at all weird if I go and sit down next to her. Except, it's in the library. Since when do I frequent the library? She'll definitely suspect something.  
  
Oh, this'll never work. Never! I'm doomed  
  
* * * * *  
  
'… The daisy roots should be stewed until green, and then…'  
  
Oh, I can't concentrate. He's not even here. *Why* will he not leave me alone?  
  
Gggrrr…  
  
'… You stir the potion until it turns purple…'  
  
He came in! He has just walked into the library! What on earth is he doing here? He never usually comes in here. He never usually even does his homework, let alone researches it. Maybe he's getting a book out about Quidditch…? Of course he is.  
  
He's seen me; he's coming over. Okay, act *normal*. Normal!  
  
* * * * *  
  
*Who* put this book here? Does 'Scamander' start with a 'v'? I think not! It's appalling, the state of my library. All these students traipsing their mud and dirt through, and tearing the edges of all the pages… It's a disgrace.  
  
'Madam Pince?'  
  
'Yes?'  
  
'Can I get this book out please?'  
  
'A History of Hogwarts Headmasters'? What on earth do they want with that?  
  
'Uh-hum'  
  
I'll just check it out for them. Maybe they'll leave then.  
  
They're leaving. One pair less of grubby paws.  
  
Oh no! It's the Weasley twins! No, wait, it's not. There's only one. Perhaps one of their brothers? He must be up to no good. Runs in the family. Except that Percy. I liked him. He had a proper respect for books.  
  
Better follow him. He's going up to Hermione Granger. I like her too. Never an overdue book. She does spend too much time in here though.  
  
''Mione.'  
  
Does he not understand the meaning of 'no talking'?  
  
'Yeah, Ron?'  
  
Ron! I thought I knew his name.  
  
'Erm… can I speak to you for a second?'  
  
The sign says: 'No talking'!! Is he blind?  
  
'Sure…'  
  
'Erm…'  
  
Oooh, he's going red. Maybe I will let him talk – this is interesting.  
  
'I was wondering… if… you wanted to… you don't have to, you understand… but if you wanted to… would you like to go with me 'round Hogsmeade this Saturday?'  
  
He said that *fast*. She's going even redder than him! Hehehe…  
  
'I'd - I'd like that.'  
  
I know, my life is boring. I work in a library, for Merlin's sake! His ears are practically maroon. Oh… I haven't laughed this much in ages.  
  
'Okay… I understand… wait, what? Oh! Erm… I'll see you then. Hrm.'  
  
He's leaving. Oh… that was *funny*!  
  
* * * * *  
  
She said 'yes'! She said 'yes'! Oh… I'm so happy! And nervous… Yeeeee!  
  
* * * * *  
  
He asked me out! He asked me out! Oh… I'm so happy! And nervous… Yeeeee!  
  
  
  
Epilogue  
  
Oh my God! I can't believe what I just heard! I have *got* to tell Fred. C'mon legs, run faster  
  
'Lackadaisical.'  
  
Is he in here? He's not in the common room. Try the dorms!  
  
::puff puff::  
  
'Fred! Fred!'  
  
'What, George?'  
  
'You'll *never* believe what I just found out!'  
  
'What?'  
  
'Ron fancies Hermione!!' 


End file.
